“Ah, you indispensable beryllium Nanako?” the gangly antheral said arsenic soon arsenic helium entered the café. He looked similar helium was successful his aboriginal forties, and had a calmer, much relaxed vibe than I was expecting.
“I’m Tsuchiya. Nice to conscionable you,” helium said arsenic helium sat down successful beforehand of me, chill and collected. “Have you already ordered thing to drink? I travel present a lot; they bash precise bully cheesecake. Would you similar to effort some? Go on, it truly is delicious—let maine dainty you to a piece.”
It was an juncture worthy commemorating. My brushwood with Tsuchiya, my precise archetypal PerfectStrangers match.
After I’d registered my illustration connected PerfectStrangers, I perused the tract until I understood however it worked. It looked similar determination were 2 ways to conscionable someone. You acceptable a clip and approximate determination (say, 5pm connected specified and specified a day, successful Shibuya), added a abbreviated remark (“Looking guardant to a large chat!”), and past posted it connected the site. This was known arsenic “listing a chat.” Logged-in users could presumption these listings connected a announcement board, and if they wanted to conscionable you, they could reply to your station by clicking “Respond.” If you received aggregate responses, you sifted done them and picked the idiosyncratic you astir wanted to meet. If you didn’t consciousness similar gathering immoderate of them, you could diminution them each and cancel the listing. And if you didn’t get immoderate responses, of course, your gathering would conscionable autumn through. So successful bid to conscionable someone, you had to either database a chat and hold for idiosyncratic to respond, oregon respond to idiosyncratic else’s listing.
I felt a spot similar I was being pushed into it, but past again, determination was nary constituent conscionable staring astatine the tract forever. This feline seemed each right, truthful wherefore not conscionable up with him conscionable to effort it out?
Just making a illustration wasn’t capable to acceptable things successful motion. The much I browsed the site, the much I understood that, dissimilar Facebook oregon Twitter, determination was nary amusive successful conscionable browsing. All you could truly bash was “like” the intriguing radical astatine the apical of the popularity rankings, oregon spell done and tag each your interests—#reading, #travel, and truthful on—and past cheque retired radical with the aforesaid tags arsenic you.
I looked astatine the existent listings by those who were seeking idiosyncratic to meet. They were offering meetings astatine a full scope of antithetic times, yet tons of them hadn’t had a azygous response, their posts going unanswered. What if nary 1 responded to mine, either? That would beryllium sad, embarrassing. Or what if I lone got responses from weirdos? I dithered, incapable to muster the resoluteness to acceptable up my ain meeting.
Just then, I got an alert from Facebook Messenger. I didn’t admit the sender.
“Hello! I’m Tsuchiya,” began the message, implicit with affable waving emoji. “I enactment successful advertising. I saw you connected PerfectStrangers and thought I’d message. I spot you’re new—nice to marque your acquaintance! I’m not an expert, but if you request immoderate assistance utilizing the site, conscionable ask. ” I had mixed feelings. I was partially reassured by the quality of this benignant stranger, but besides a small suspicious arsenic to wherefore helium had contacted maine retired of the blue.
“Thank you for the offer. How did you find me, though?” I replied.
“Do you mean however I recovered you connected Facebook? ” came the reply, accompanied by different emoji—this 1 looking somewhat sheepish, I thought. The connection continued, “User profiles connected PerfectStrangers person small Facebook and Twitter icons astatine the bottom. You tin click them to spot the user’s Facebook oregon Twitter feed. If you get a effect from idiosyncratic you deliberation mightiness beryllium dodgy, you should cheque retired their societal media—it tin beryllium bully to spot wherever they enactment and find retired a spot much astir them. You tin archer much astir what they’re similar from their posts and tweets, too.
“Also, radical who’ve conscionable signed up to PerfectStrangers and users who’re presently online are displayed arsenic featured users. Down astatine the bottom. Can you spot that?”
It was beauteous guardant of him to connection maine similar this, but astatine slightest helium seemed friendly.
“Oh, yes, I spot it…Thanks for your help. It’s each caller to me,” I replied.
“Are you readying to database a chat? Or conscionable looking astir for now?” helium asked.
“I conjecture nothing’s going to hap till I database one. But I was disquieted nary 1 would respond.”
“Why don’t I beryllium your archetypal gathering then? If you acceptable a day and time, I’ll respond to your listing. You could acceptable it up present for practice, if you want. It’s ever bully to effort caller things! ”
I felt a spot similar I was being pushed into it, but past again, determination was nary constituent conscionable staring astatine the tract forever. This feline seemed each right, truthful wherefore not conscionable up with him conscionable to effort it out?
“Okay, convey you. Let’s springiness it a shot. I’ll effort posting now.”
And that was however my gathering with Tsuchiya came about.
*
Tsuchiya picked a spot successful Tokyo’s Oku-Shibuya district, a stylish café that was superior astir its coffee. I arrived archetypal and waited, feeling jittery and nervous. I’m astir to socialize with a stranger! This is happening! I kept glancing astir the café and fidgeting, smoothing retired the creases successful my skirt. But erstwhile Tsuchiya came successful and we said hello, I recovered myself calming down and reasoning that actually, this wasn’t truthful scary aft all. He was casual to speech to, which helped. By the clip I’d ordered a java and a portion of the cheesecake helium recommended, my nerves had each but disappeared.
“So… you’ve been utilizing PerfectStrangers for rather a while, then?” I asked Tsuchiya. “What made you determine to effort it? How are you uncovering it?”
“Well, it makes a bully alteration from going for java connected your own. And it’s stimulating talking to young people, it sometimes gives maine caller ideas for work. It’s bully fun. What astir you, wherefore are you connected the site?”
“I’ve separated from my husband. I thought it would beryllium bully to effort thing new, and I thought I mightiness arsenic good get immoderate signifier recommending books to radical portion I’m astatine it,” I said.
“You’re separated? I see, you must’ve had a hard clip of it then. I person a feeling I’m missing portion of the story, though…You intrigue me, Nanako. Could I inquire wherefore you and your hubby divided up? It’s perfectly good if you don’t privation to speech astir it.”
“Um…” I hesitated a moment.
My hubby and I worked for the aforesaid institution and we had a batch of friends successful common, truthful I hadn’t truly spoken to anyone astir our reasons for separating. If I lone gave my broadside of the story, I’d inevitably dependable similar the victim, which didn’t look fair. I saw our separation arsenic a communal failure, and I had nary tendency to nonstop immoderate blasted oregon resentment toward my husband. In fact, I felt atrocious that the lone decision I’d travel to truthful acold was that I wanted to enactment immoderate abstraction betwixt america for a while, arsenic a mode of putting disconnected the occupation for the clip being.
But Tsuchiya had nary engagement successful my beingness whatsoever. I didn’t person to interest astir him meddling—he wouldn’t gossip to anyone who knew my husband, oregon archer my hubby what I’d said. He was a full alien whom I’d beryllium with contiguous and contiguous only, truthful I felt capable to unbend and adjacent gag astir the separation.
Tsuchiya listened with involvement arsenic I spoke, nodding attentively present and then.
“Well, you conscionable each sorts of radical connected the site!” helium said. “Seeing arsenic you’re separated, you could adjacent usage it to find a boyfriend. I mean, forgive maine for saying this—but a idiosyncratic tin miss that carnal connection, don’t you think?”
Um, excuse me? I was taken aback by his misguided words of encouragement. But past it occurred to maine that possibly successful a concern similar this, radical felt they could beryllium much familiar, and notation things similar enactment much easily.
“Oh, I’m not truly missing the carnal connection. But I accidental it mightiness beryllium bully to find a fellow sometime,” I said noncommittally, trying to sidestep the topic.
But Tsuchiya continued. “I mean, not connection, exactly, but…Well, I’m talking astir intersexual intimacy! Though I thought that mightiness beryllium excessively blunt. But it’s not peculiarly outrageous to suggest that women mightiness privation sex, too, is it?”
For immoderate reason, our treatment seemed to presume that I was sexually frustrated.
I recovered it refreshing that successful this thirty-minute slot I’d been capable to driblet each formality and poke amusive astatine him, that we’d been capable to commercialized jests. And the information I wouldn’t person to spot him again made it easier, somehow.
“That’s conscionable however it is,” Tsuchiya continued, arsenic though pressing maine for immoderate benignant of acknowledgment. “I mean, I’m a large believer successful equality betwixt men and women, I respect women. But women who effort truthful hard connected their ain without a antheral tin look a bit…you know? I deliberation a pistillate tin truly blossom erstwhile she’s got a antheral to emotion and fulfill her.”
“Oh…?” I said. I realized I was smiling done gritted teeth. This seemed to beryllium a favored mentation of his—and a wholly antiquated 1 astatine that.
“Don’t get maine wrong, I’m not trying to accidental you ever request a antheral around, oregon that you look hopeless oregon thing similar that! I conscionable meant, I’m definite you’ll find someone.”
“Thank you precise much. Yes—it would beryllium beauteous if I could find a bully antheral similar Pierre Taki,” I said, trying to wrest the baton from Tsuchiya and alteration the subject.
“Pierre Taki? What, the actor? Is helium your type? That’s unusual! Well, I whitethorn not beryllium arsenic entertaining arsenic him, but I’ll spell retired for meal with you anytime, and you tin speech astir however things are with your husband, oregon whatever’s bothering you, and get it each disconnected your chest. Sex oregon nary sex, it’s good by me—your privation is my command. Only kidding!”
So, helium wanted to steer the speech backmost to enactment aft all. I was getting fed up—but I couldn’t contradict that it was acknowledgment to Tsuchiya I’d taken this archetypal step. I should truly beryllium overmuch obliged to him.
“That’s precise bully of you, but I deliberation astatine the infinitesimal I conscionable privation to effort gathering tons of antithetic radical connected Perfect-Strangers. It’s been large gathering you similar this, truthful I’m truly excited to conscionable different people, too!” I answered, mentally adding, by which I mean, I don’t program connected seeing you again.
“Yes. Of course. It’s conscionable determination are a batch of dodgy radical connected there,” helium said. At this point, it was astir apt clip to archer him to person a bully agelong look successful the mirror.
“Well, they can’t beryllium overmuch dodgier than you,” I said, jokingly rebuffing him.
“Hey! That’s a unspeakable happening to say! Come connected now, let’s beryllium friends,” helium said, getting into the tone of things.
“Hmm…Nah, seems excessively overmuch similar hard work.” “Oh, excessively mean!”
I recovered it refreshing that successful this thirty-minute slot I’d been capable to driblet each formality and poke amusive astatine him, that we’d been capable to commercialized jests. And the information I wouldn’t person to spot him again made it easier, somehow.
My gentle snub seemed to person done the trick, and aft that, Tsuchiya chatted to maine astir the advertisement industry, what his occupation progressive and the adverts he’d worked connected recently, arsenic acold arsenic helium could sermon them.
As our gathering was coming to its end, I hastily asked him astir books. What benignant of happening did helium usually read, and what mightiness helium similar to try?
“Well, I haven’t work that overmuch recently… Maybe a novel?” helium said.
From what I gathered, helium didn’t support up with the latest books oregon work an atrocious lot. To beryllium honest, I’d been enactment disconnected by that doggedness of his, often recovered successful middle-aged men: his pushing for different gathering and attempting to crowbar successful the taxable of sex. But helium showed immoderate sensitivity erstwhile helium talked astir his work, and I felt determination was a much nuanced broadside to him. Based connected his property and his job, I thought he’d astir apt similar to work thing contemporary, alternatively than a classic.
I would urge him thing by Takehiro Higuchi, an writer I’d discovered conscionable precocious and been blown distant by. When I’d archetypal work Higuchi’s writing, I was thrilled—he utilized connection successful a wholly caller mode and presented specified a caller perspective. Tsuchiya worked successful advertising, aft all, truthful if helium wasn’t already acquainted with this caller talent, I would present him. Farewell Zoshigaya would beryllium a large choice…But then, Tsuchiya seemed to person enactment connected the brain, truthful instead, I picked Sex successful Japan. It was close determination successful the title, truthful possibly he’d springiness the publication a shot. It was suitably current, too, having conscionable travel retired successful paperback.
Sex successful Japan is astir a hubby and woman who task into the satellite of swinging. At first, it conscionable seems similar a portion of erotica, but midway through, it becomes a caller astir violence, and past a courtroom novel, and it finishes up arsenic a communicative astir axenic love. It’s entertaining successful its absurdity, a existent roller coaster of a ride. I hoped Tsuchiya would bask it. So that was however I made my archetypal publication recommendation.
I sent it to Tsuchiya a time oregon 2 aboriginal via Facebook Messenger, on with a fewer words of thanks.
_______________________________
From The Bookshop Woman: My Year Transforming Lives—One Book astatine a Time by Nanako Hanada, translated by Cat Anderson. Copyright © 2026. Available from Tiny Reparations Books, an imprint of Penguin Publishing Group, a part of Penguin Random House, LLC.
English (US) ·